At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
