if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
