As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
