Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
His nipple licking is glorious
Randomize