Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
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