its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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