She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
