love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
