erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
