if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I deserve this hangover.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
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