careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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