You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize
