I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
