I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Randomize
