so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize
