my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Randomize
