I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Use "feeling words"
Yay
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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