i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
