He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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