Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize