Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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