just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
