he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
