After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
