this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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