Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
