Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
