after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Randomize
