Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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