is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
