I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
