Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
