i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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