So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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