none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
