Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
