I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
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