we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Well I just put wine in my tea
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
