I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
