The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize