I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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