...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
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