I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
pop tarts are not kleenex
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize