Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
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