I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
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