That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Just cropdusted the office
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
