No stitches, just platelets and will power
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Randomize
