worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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