did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Randomize