"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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