I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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